Keep Sweet

Patty and I have been using a new phrase when we finish talking to each other on the phone: keep sweet. If you aren't familiar with that phrase you haven't been reading books about all the problems within the FLDS church. Patty and I have read three of them recently since the news about their prophet's demise and new throne in a prison cell is only months old.

Actually, we see nothing wrong with keeping sweet. We all enjoy surrounding ourselves with people who have a sweet, friendly demeanor. Many of us could use a lot more sweetness in our lives. I believe, too, that keeping sweet (as much as possible) allows Jesus to shine through our countenance. No one wants to encounter angry people on a regular basis.

So, why, when we see the importance of keeping sweet, do we laugh each time we say it?

Let me give you the FLDS definition of keeping sweet:

- Awake each morning with plans to make your husband happy, regardless

- Be in total obedience to him for he knows what is best for you, even if that includes abuse

- Never, never, never voice your own feelings or hurts for they only show how disobedient you have been

- Failure to keep sweet under any and all circumstances means you have lost favor with God, the prophet, and your husband

- Keeping sweet simply means losing your own individuality and becoming property, disposable property

- Keeping sweet ensures eternal life that can only be achieved through your husband, the priesthood head of the family.

Are there really women like that in modern America? Sadly, there are and many of them have a miserable existence. Many are escaping their repressive lifestyles but are so ill prepared for the world outside of their compound's walls. Many are denied an education, believing their husbands will teach them whatever is necessary to learn. When Patty and I laugh over keeping sweet, we aren't making fun of the women who only know this one way of life and are too fearful to turn their backs on it. We are poking fun at their so-called prophet.

He's the one telling all the women to keep sweet. And while the female believers are doing their best to keep sweet and never have a display of emotions, he was doing everything in the book that was against the very things he preached. It's fitting that his reign as a dictator is over and I hope he is keeping sweet in prison. That would be a major feat since he has many more legal battles ahead of him.

No marriage is a bed of roses, but at least our husbands acknowledge that we were born with brains. We do not need them to do the thinking for us, or make major decisions that affect our lives, or demand respect when it hasn't been earned. I don't see any of us begging for forgiveness from a husband who has just rearranged our face. And how many of us would be comforted knowing our husband's position as the head of our families determines our own salvation? Yikes. It's sometimes scary standing on our own two feet, but at least we have the free will to choose who we serve.

These stories of injured women emerging and getting a taste of life have been fascinating. And knowing one man can have such complete control over the masses is unbelievable. This isn't some remote jungle in South America. This is our country. Pick up copies and be prepared to be shocked, angered, and pulling for the good guy (or girl). I don't think you'll be disappointed.

oh, and Keep Sweet.