Allison bought me a book she thought I'd enjoy reading. It was one of those that can't be put down. It is read during commercials, late into the night, and while dinner is simmering on the stove. It's called Escape and it's Carolyn Jessop's story of her life as a Fundamentalist Latter Day Saint (FLDS) and how she escaped her polygamist lifestyle. FLDS is an offshoot of the Mormon church.
It answered many questions I'd had about polygamy. I just can't imagine a plural marriage. We all know that marriage to one person is hard enough without throwing a few more spouses into the mix. My opinion had been that having multiple wives was not unlike having a wall shelf full of trophies. The age-old fascination with variety. I discovered that it is much more than that. It is about building the ego and attaining power and making oneself into a god. And all in the name of God.
If something went wrong in Carolyn's life - and it did often - then it was because she was being punished for not being obedient enough or surrendering her will to her husband. His approval, his likes and dislikes, and his authority were all that mattered. He was the only one to have an opinion and final say in his large household.
Granted, submission is Biblical. But the Lord has strong and solemn expectations for the husband also. He is to love his wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for it. What couple could find fault with a relationship such as that? They would be in complete harmony with each other. It's the way God meant for marriage to be.
Where some religions fail is teaching that the husband always has the last word, that his decisions are final. A wife is not expected to submit to a husband who is asking her to do something that the Bible teaches against. Women have minds and reasoning powers too. We alone will face the judgment based on our own actions. Therefore, total submission to a husband who is not always asking God's direction in his marriage and daily affairs should not expect a wife to blindly follow him.
As the book described incidences that were so foreign to God's teachings on marriage, it cleared up some of my questions about the practice of polygamy. And my heart went out to Carolyn and the other women who were trapped in a community where they had no voice. I applaud her courage and determination to escape. I suggest that all of you read this book for a better understanding of what still goes on in this modern world in 2007.
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3 comments:
I want it next - after I finish my "5 love languages"
How much of it still goes on and how do they get away with it legally?
Cristal, the FLDS Church has thousands of members and they all practice polygamy. The police force in their community are members, too, so there is no one to come to their aid.
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